It's time for you to suck it up for the sake of your family. Stop being selfish and take those pictures. 3 reasons why:
1. It isn't about you.
One of the most common statements I hear, particularly from moms, is, "When I lose weight, I'm going to hire you for family pictures." I REALLLLLY get this. I've been trying to "lose weight" for 20 years. Every winter, I say, "I'm going to lose ___ lbs by summer so I can get a cute bathing suit." And every summer I say, "Well that didn't happen. I'm going to lose ____ lbs so I don't look like a cow in my winter coat."
Every. Single. Year. since I had kids.
The thing is, these pictures aren't just for you. Your family NEEDS them. What will they have when you've passed on? We don't like to talk about death, but it's inevitable. Does your family have pictures they can hang on their walls to show their children, grandchildren, etc? Do they have something of quality they can pass down through the generations? Does a memory of you pop up in their phones while they're scrolling?
My oldest daughter, after having been denied for a selfie with me for the millionth time, complained with obvious disappointment, "Mom, I have ZERO pictures with you." I quickly dismissed her with some statement about how we have several pictures together and left it at that. But then as that statement kept running through my head over the next few days, I realized it was a lie. My then 14 year old daughter was 7 years old in the last family picture I could find of us. Seven. And that was a backyard snapshot taken by my mother-in-law. I, a professional photographer, had NO professional pictures of my family and only ONE snapshot. (I immediately hired a local photographer to remedy this issue.) But it's more than having a wall-worthy image. Your kids want something on their phones, their facebook pages, etc. How can we deny them this request? They want photos of US? There are much worse things your kid could otherwise be posting on social media. Now my daughter says multiple times as she scrolls through her phone, "Mom! We take such great selfies together!" Suck it up, mom. Get in the picture.
2. Your family thinks you're beautiful.
We will always be our worst critic. But our kids don't see us the same way we do. I recently went to bed with wet hair because I was too lazy to dry it. I have naturally funky wavy hair, so I woke up with what can only be described as Medusa hair. I came out with coffee in hand and sat on the couch, as I heard my daughter say, "Oh my gosh mommy, you look so pretty with your curly hair!" Listen people, I looked like crap. No lie. And it's not like she's a little toddler who doesn't understand fashion - she's 17 years old! But our children see us with a different pair of eyes than we do. They think we're beautiful. Give them something to hold on to. Get in the picture.
3. You're teaching your daughter to hate her appearance.
Your daughter (and your son) is gorgeous. You know it. Her dad knows it. But she doesn't. She's going through that self-conscious stage when she feels awkward and pressured to look perfect. And you're reinforcing that insecurity when you tell her you won't take a picture with her because you're too fat. You're embedding the idea in her head that there's a such thing as "too fat for photos". You're ensuring that awful but contagious lie that "I'm not good enough". Show her that you're beautiful and she's beautiful and he's handsome. Get in the picture.
(Bonus point: Hire a professional and talk to her/him about your concerns. We know how to pose you to achieve a more flattering look and help minimize your concerns. Then, if and when you really do lose the weight - take family pictures AGAIN! What a success story you'll have...)
Take the selfie.
Hire the photographer.
Hang the picture on your wall.
Suck it up, mom...this one's for them.
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